Back to School Prep for Kids & Co-Parents

It's only July but the messages and shift in attention to back-to-school has already begun.

And if you’re co-parenting, the transition comes with extra layers: Who’s covering the costs? What’s the plan for that chaotic first week? How do we keep things consistent when routines stretch across two households?

Here are some practical ways to get ahead of the transition so it’s not as stressful for you and your co parent.

1. Have the Logistics Conversation Now

If you and your co parent are able to have a productive conversation, schedule 15–20 minutes for a focused check-in about the new school year. Keep the agenda short and focused.

For example:

• Who’s buying what (school supplies, clothes, fees)
• First-day plans (drop-off, pick-up, photos, will both of you be attending, etc.)
• Morning and evening routines across both homes
• Homework, activities, and communication with teachers

Keep it short and neutral. Think of a "business meeting," not an emotional summit. And if meeting in person or talking on the phone is too much, use text or email.

2. Share the Calendar

Even if your parenting schedule is already set, back-to-school brings new challenges, open houses, orientation, early dismissal days, and extracurriculars.

Use a shared calendar app (or even a printed version) and fill in what you know.

Additional things to think about:

• Supply drop-offs
• Medical appointments like sports physicals
• After-school care or transportation logistics

Being proactive reduces miscommunications and keeps kids out of the middle.

3. Clarify What “Prepared” Looks Like

Does your child need duplicate items at both houses? What do they need to take back and forth?

Ask yourself: What would make the kids feel steady and prepared in both homes?

That might mean basic supplies like chargers and a quiet homework space, or a consistent bedtime. This isn’t about duplication, it’s about predictability and consistency.

4. Center Your Kid in the Conversation

No matter how you and your co parent feel about each other, help your child feel confident that the school year isn’t something they have to manage on their own.

Bring them into the planning (as age appropriate) and share information:

• Who’s doing drop-off and pickup
• What does their schedule look like?
• What happens if they forget something at the other house

Kids handle transitions better when they know what to expect. Even better? When they feel like their voice matters in the planning.

5. Let Go of the Myth of a Perfect Start

No matter how well you plan, there will be hiccups. A forgotten lunchbox, a miscommunication, a meltdown over the wrong kind of pencil. That doesn’t mean you failed. It means you’re parenting.

Instead of chasing perfection, aim for flexibility and repair. Your kid doesn’t need you to get everything right, they need to know you’ve got their back when things go sideways. 💝