Finding Your People: Building a New Social Circle After Divorce

After a divorce, even the simplest social moments can feel complicated. Friends may pick sides, routines shift, and the people you counted on each weekend might not be there in the same way anymore. It can be lonely, confusing, and strangely quiet.

But here's something else I've seen again and again I’ve seen again and again: the space that feels empty right now is also full of possibility. This is your chance to build your circle, people who see you as you are today, not who you were before everything changed.

Start with Who You Are Now

When your life shifts, so do your connections. That’s not failure, it’s growth. Before filling your calendar, take time to get clear on what kind of energy you want around you.

Ask yourself:

• Who feels easy to be around?
  
  
• Who supports my peace, not just my plans?
  
  
• What kind of relationships do I want to nurture next?
  
  

When you know who you are becoming, you naturally draw people who align with that.

Here’s a Good Place to > Start Feeling Like Yourself Again

Be Open to Small Beginnings

You don’t have to rebuild your social life overnight. Maybe it starts with chatting with another parent at your child’s practice, joining a local class, or reconnecting with someone you’ve lost touch with.

Every friendship starts small. Consistency and curiosity go a long way. You might be surprised how many people are also looking for meaningful connections but don’t know where to start.

Try to focus on shared values, not just shared history.

Release the Pressure to Replace

It’s easy to think you have to “replace” what was lost, but try focusing on expansion vs. replication. The relationships ahead might look completely different, and that’s a good thing.

You’re not recreating your old life, you’re creating something new. Give yourself permission to enjoy new dynamics and be open to meeting people who are a good reflection of where you are now.

Create Support You Can Count On

One of the most healing things you can do is surround yourself with people who get it. That might mean joining a support group, leaning into your faith community, or working with a divorce coach like me, who helps you rebuild your confidence and communication skills.

And if you already have one trusted person, a friend, family member, or coach, who lets you be honest without judgment, that’s a strong start. Don't be afraid to ask for the support you need!

If you’re looking for a place to connect, I have a community full of people on a similar path. You’ll find shared experiences, helpful tools, and steady support. Join us here!

A Closing Thought

You don’t need a big group to feel whole. You just need your team—the ones who make you feel seen, grounded, and inspired to keep moving forward.

Every conversation, every shared laugh, every small act of connection is a step toward the life you’re creating next. And I promise, it’s one worth showing up for.