Do I Need a Therapist or Divorce Coach?

I’m confused - what’s the difference between a therapist and divorce coach?

This is a great question that comes up often as people look for guidance during divorce. Both roles provide meaningful support, and ideally everyone could have both on their team. However, it’s still important to understand the differences between the two so you can understand which professional is best suited for your specific needs and importantly, how best to utilize them.

The Role of a Therapist

Therapists are licensed mental health professionals trained to address emotional and psychological issues. Their primary goal is to help you process feelings, understand your emotional responses, and develop healthy coping mechanisms. Therapists use evidence-based techniques to guide you through various challenges, including trauma, anxiety, depression, and grief, among others. They may also recommend medication or prescribe it themselves if they are a psychiatrist.

During a divorce, a therapist can be extremely helpful as you:

• Process the emotional pain associated with the end of a marriage.
• Address underlying issues such as abandonment fears, self-esteem challenges, or unresolved past traumas.
• Develop strategies to manage stress and anxiety.
• Support mental health conditions that may be exacerbated by the divorce.

Therapists often work in an exploratory and reflective manner, allowing clients to uncover emotional patterns and achieve long-term psychological growth. Sessions may focus on helping you make sense of your emotions and find healing over time.

The Role of a Divorce Coach

Divorce coaches, on the other hand, are trained specialists who focus specifically on the practical and emotional aspects of the divorce process. A divorce coach is focused on helping you navigate this time in your life, serving as a guide, advocate, resource and thinking partner so you can make informed decisions and stay organized during the legal and logistical complexities of the process.

Divorce coaches often assist with:

• Setting goals for life during and after divorce.
• Developing a clear plan and assisting with divorce-related tasks such as financial paperwork and custody arrangements.
• Improving communication skills, particularly when dealing with a co-parent or your legal team.
• Offering emotional support without delving deeply into psychological healing.
• Providing resources and referrals, such as connecting clients with attorneys, financial planners, or support groups.

A divorce coach emphasizes forward momentum by breaking down the overwhelming tasks into manageable pieces and even assisting as you tackle each item.

Key Differences Between a Therapist and a Divorce Coach

Divorce Coaches

Therapists

Areas of Focus

Strategic, practical guidance through the divorce, including areas for compromise, empowerment, confidence & process logistics

Emotional healing, personal growth, understanding patterns, and exploring history

Examples

- Mediation preparation- Communication with your professional team- Co-parenting support- Divorce logistics- Building your professional team- Goal setting

- Emotional recovery during and beyond the divorce process- Exploration of underlying issues/causes- Diagnosing and treating mental health conditions

Meeting Frequency

As needed. Weekly or more, via text, email, phone, or in person

Usually hour-long sessions once a week

Training

I am Certified Divorce Coach®, trained mediator, and I’ve completed the Colorado Bar Association’s Level I, II and advanced collaborative trainings.

Individual training varies, so ask when researching coaches.

Licensed professionals with degrees in psychology, counseling, or social work. They undergo rigorous training, supervised clinical experience and must meet state licensure requirements.

Psychiatrists are also M.D.’s.

Which Professional Should You Choose?

Choosing between a therapist and a divorce coach depends on your unique circumstances and needs, and it’s worthwhile to note that there is some overlap when it comes to providing emotional support.

If your primary concern is managing the practicalities of divorce, a divorce coach can offer the guidance and support you need to stay organized and focused. They’re particularly useful if you’re navigating a high-conflict divorce or need help with co-parenting strategies.

If you’re struggling with intense emotions, trauma, or mental health challenges, a therapist might be the best choice. Their expertise can help you process the psychological toll of divorce and equip you with tools for long-term emotional well-being.

For many people, the ideal solution may involve both professionals. A therapist can help you work through current and past issues that may be relevant during divorce, and a divorce coach can provide the practical tools and strategies to move forward effectively.